Goodbye Lynn Ruth

Hi Lynn Ruth,

Sorry I didn't write you earlier. You were always so good at replying emails immediately. When I saw that you hadn't replied in over a week, I was filled with dread. I tried to hang on to a glimmer of hope that maybe you were just too tired and needed a few more days rest. But now you're gone and you won't be reading this, which makes me kind of crazy to be writing it. 

I used to make fun of people who wrote on social media to dead celebrities. I thought it was pretentious. Who were they writing to? The recipient is dead! But I kind of get it now. At least, a little. I tried to write something about you on Facebook this morning. It was hard to refer to you in the third person. Writing to you is so much easier. I guess this really is more for me than you, if I'm being honest.

I don't know what you would say to that, but I bet it would be hilarious and comforting. I don't know how you do it. Just bringing joy to people you talk to. I don't think you do either. I think you just do it by being you.

Hey, you know what we're supposed to say to the deceased? Rest in Peace. I bet you have a joke about that. Because wherever you are, I bet you're doing a million different things, right now. I just can't see you resting on your laurels.

I'm really sorry about October 11th. I guess we'll have to take a raincheck for awhile and I do mean awhile, because I do intend to live a long life. Maybe even up to 87! Also, I don't really believe in the afterlife. Even though I'm already missing you a lot, I don't think that's going to change anytime soon.

I'm trying to keep this one upbeat. Can you tell?

The truth is, I cried several times today. I actually feel a bit guilty about it because I don't think I cried as much when my father died. Maybe tears are not a good measure of sadness. What do you think? I'd like to think I'm every bit as sad about my father's death as I am about yours. Okay, that was a selfish thought. I'm going to be okay though. Don't you worry about me.

Hey, here's another selfish thought. I'm glad we met. If I wasn't opening at the Crackhouse on that weekend, our paths would probably not have crossed. I would have missed the Lynn Ruth Miller boat entirely. I feel lucky that we met. I really do! I don't say that to every visiting comic, you know.

You know what else I'm glad for? I'm glad you wrote your book. Thanks for sending it to me. You're many different things, but whatever you were doing, I always thought you were doing it as a storyteller. And I'm glad you told your story. To be honest, I haven't finished reading it. Sorry I lied that time. I will read it though. I'm not promising you. Just telling you I want to. I'm glad you lived a long fascinating life.

I'm going to go live my life now, Lynn Ruth. Take care of yourself. You will continue to inspire me. I will miss you. And of course, I will never forget you.

Love,
Sim

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