I feel horrible for being this stupid

I just did something the dumbest thing and I instantly regretted it and I think this is one that will keep me feeling stupid for years to come.

We were out with our friends, a couple and their 2 kids and we love them, just two families enjoying dinner and having a fun time catching up. Then a dish was served and it was octopus.

Then our friend mentioned that she hates it whenever she finds out that a food she loves to eat turns out to be an relatively intelligent animal. And I said that reminded me of a Jimmy O-Yang joke about how he hates eating free range chicken. He doesn't want to eat the happy chicken, he wants to eat the chicken that's going through a divorce.

And as soon as I said that, I remembered my wife had told me that these friends we're having dinner with also going through a divorce. They're wonderful people and I love them but in a moment of self-centredness, I forgot what was happening in their lives and I accidentally invented the worst thing I could have said and said it. 

And their kids were at the table too!

So, for the rest of the night, I just pretended I didn't know about the divorce and everyone pretended I hadn't said anything wrong, and the whole time, I just wanted the earth to open up and swallow me.

Why didn't I just say 'eat an unhappy chicken'? Why did I have to be so specific? Stupid comedy instincts! I was paraphrasing the bit and I don't remember how it went and I just thought it wouldn't be a punchline without specifics and at that moment, I just hastily associated unhappiness with divorce because that's what everybody does. I don't even feel that way about it. I think everyone who decides on getting a divorce will end up happier and I wish that for my friends. It's just I needed a punchline - so I grabbed the first thing that popped in my head. That's the stupid thing about punchlines - they don't have to be clever or true, they just need to be snappy and catchy.

I needed to write about this, if nothing else, to put on record that I am extremely sorry for what I did. I did not mean to hurt anyone, even though I am aware that I did. This definitely makes the top 3 stupidest things I have ever done in my life. Stupid stupid stupid!

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